It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Parties for hosting, marshmallows for toasting … you know the drill. But for many of us, the holiday season is not the most wonderful time of the year. Sometimes it can be the hardest, especially if you’re spending your holidays in recovery.
The holidays tend to shine a spotlight on issues that may be easier to downplay during other times of the year. The season of gift-giving can be a stark reminder of your financial hardship. A bunch of parties — or even a lack of invitations — can make you feel like you’re the only one spending the holidays alone. A long-standing tradition may be a reminder of the loss of a loved one. With all the memories and challenges that seasonal festivities can bring, the last thing you want to lose is your sobriety during the holidays.
Staying Sober During the Holidays
If you want to understand how to stay sober during the holidays, it’s important to recognize that the expectation to be merry is part of the problem. When you’re struggling with mental health symptoms, holiday stress, feelings of loneliness, or the temptation to use substances, everyone may be telling you to keep your chin up and get into the holiday spirit. They may seem to be doing fine and enjoying life, which can seem very isolating. The reality is a lot of people feel stressed and overwhelmed during the holidays, so you’re not as alone as you might think.
If you want to understand how to stay sober during the holidays, it’s important to recognize that the expectation to be merry is part of the problem.
A survey by the American Heart Association found that the holidays present unique challenges for most Americans:
- 63% said the holidays are more stressful than tax season.
- 71% regret not taking time to relax and actually enjoy the season.
- The top three struggles during the holidays are healthy eating, regular exercise, and getting enough sleep.
- Nearly 8 in 10 people feel so focused on creating special moments for others that they end up neglecting their own self-care.
- More than half say it takes them weeks to feel less stressed once the holidays are over.
So what does this mean? It means that no matter the social pressure, you don’t have to pretend to feel good or white-knuckle your way through the season. Sharing your feelings with a therapist or supportive loved one can ease your burden a little and help you stay more aware of relapse triggers.
Recognizing Common Relapse Warning Signs This Season
Recognizing the warning signs of a potential relapse is crucial for staying sober during the holidays as well. After all, relapse happens in stages, not all at once. Here’s what to watch for to help avoid a relapse, according to StatPearls:
- Emotional relapse – In this initial stage, warning signs include isolating from others, skipping meetings (or not sharing in them), focusing on others’ problems instead of your own, and neglecting healthy sleeping and eating habits. These behaviors signal a lapse in self-care, which can set the stage for relapse.
- Mental relapse – At this stage, thoughts about people and places associated with past substance use may resurface, triggering cravings. You might start bargaining with yourself about using, lying to others, or even planning to use. During the holidays, it’s easy to make excuses to use if others are or if it feels like a “special occasion.”
- Physical relapse – This final stage involves actual substance use, but what happens next can either harm or help your recovery. Continuing to isolate, use, lie, and hide will significantly hinder your recovery. However, reaching out for help, being honest with yourself and others, and removing yourself from triggers can help you get back on track after a relapse.
Maintaining Your Recovery During the Holidays
Taking care of your mental, emotional, and physical health is essential to staying sober during the holidays. By releasing the pressure to constantly make others happy, you can be more present and relaxed with your loved ones. To help make this season more manageable, the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) suggests the following tips:
- Stick to your routine as much as possible. Your daily routine can provide a sense of calm and predictability. Holiday activities and events can disrupt this rhythm, so choose your commitments carefully. If you start feeling overwhelmed, use your routine to help re-center yourself.
- Prioritize self-care. Don’t let the season sweep you away to the point that you neglect yourself. Simple acts, like staying hydrated, getting enough sleep, and setting aside time for exercise — even if it’s just a 30-minute walk — can make a difference. Try to eat balanced meals and avoid overindulging in sweets.
- Set reasonable expectations. In this season of giving, remember that you still need to set healthy boundaries for yourself. It’s OK to say no to a party or to the extravagant present your sister wants you to find for your niece.
Here are a few additional ideas to help you feel refreshed rather than stressed:
- Avoid comparisons. It’s easy to think about how the holidays used to be when you were growing up or how your next-door neighbor is spending their season. But unrealistic expectations set you up for disappointment. Focus on what’s good in your life; writing down daily gratitudes can help keep you grounded.
- Remember that loneliness is temporary. As the recovery saying goes, “This too shall pass.” If you’re struggling with loneliness, consider volunteering as a way to engage with your community. Shifting focus toward helping others can reduce loneliness and bring greater satisfaction during the season of giving.
Today Is the Best Day to Seek Help
If you’re struggling with addiction or mental health challenges, you may be thinking of waiting until after the holidays to seek treatment. Perhaps you fear disappointing loved ones by being away during Thanksgiving, Christmas, or other important occasions, worrying they might not understand or forgive your absence.
However, the holiday season’s festivities can often make existing challenges feel even more overwhelming, potentially leading to a crisis. We tend to find excuses to delay what feels daunting, yet as disruptive as treatment may seem, addiction and mental health disorders are far more disruptive — and they can have life-altering consequences. The truth is there’s no “perfect time” to seek help; waiting for “tomorrow” often leads to more delay. If you’re struggling, today is the best day to start your journey toward recovery.
Get Compassionate, Evidence-Based Treatment
If addiction and mental health issues are weighing on you this holiday season, don’t hesitate to reach out to our team. Our caring staff understands what you’re going through and is here to guide you in securing your sobriety and finding long-term healing. With a range of evidence-based treatment approaches, you’ll gain the tools and support needed to build a fulfilling life free from addiction and the challenges of mental health struggles. The holidays can be the perfect time to start fresh, setting yourself up to enter the new year with renewed hope and confidence. Contact us today to learn more about how we can help.